Stupidity Squared

[Gomez Adams]

I tell you, I weep for the future. Hell, I weep for the here and now.

So I finally finished installing all the rock walls and gravel and all that jazz and I'm left with three empty wooden pallets that it all came on. When you have something like that you can't put in your garbage can, you put it out at the curb and call Waste Management and they'll send a special truck to pick it up the next garbage day. (Mine is Monday.)

Items I've had them pick up before:

• An old queen size mattress
• A 55 inch projection TV
• A sofa and love seat

Well, apparently, they draw the line at wooden pallets. They consider it "construction debris" and as such it's off limits to them. So, they'll pick up a toxic TV, a synthetic mattress and a sofa and loveseat filled with God only knows what, but they draw the line at a wooden pallet that will rot completely in just a few months.

Wow.

Just wow.

That's OK. They're taking them anyway. I'll just break out the skill saw and cut them down and put them in the can.

 

[Zeedox]

Our special collection is the same - no construction waste. Hell, we've watch them load an old oil furnace (it was ours and the following year there was a new 75lb limit) on our twice yearly special pickup day.

 

[Gomez Adams]

Well, get this:

Remember the debacle I had with Lowe's trying to buy a $2,000.00 law mower? Well, that's where I got all the stones and gravel - not that I wanted to deal with Lowe's but they're the only ones that carried the stones I wanted.

So at first they say everything will be delivered Friday, April 8th.

Then they call to say that they don't have one of the stones in stock, but it'll be delivered on Monday.

Then they call on Monday to tell me that they don't even sell that stone anymore. When I inform them I just got a delivery notice that it would be delivered Monday, they said they'd call me back.

About an hour later, they call me back and say they found a whole pallet of them so mine will in fact be delivered on Monday, the 11th.

Sure enough, they get delivered.

So on Wednesday, that project was finished and I had somehow miscalculated the number of stones I needed, so I returned the extra 10 I had and got some money back.

After all of that, I had the three pallets out front I was trying to get rid of. Stay with me now...I'm getting there.

So after I make this post, I figure it's beer time. So I grab a Stella and no sooner do I pop the top than my phone goes off with an email alert.

It's from Lowe's. It says they're about to deliver my pavers. You know, the ones that were delivered the week before that are already in the ground.

So on that email there's a link that says, "Click here to reschedule your delivery". I click it thinking maybe I can call it off and tell them it's already delivered.

Nope. Just takes me to a page that says, "Your delivery is in transit and will be there soon!"

So about 30 minutes later, the big Lowe's truck shows up, does a 25 point turn in the cul de sac to get turned around and I'm out there waiting for him to get out of the truck.

I pretty much tell him everything I just told you. He shakes his head and says, "Man, these people have absolutely no idea what they hell they're doing anymore."

So I ask him, "Well, since you're here, how about take those three pallets of yours back with you?"

He says, "OK. No problem."